Steve Lineback wrote:

>If this group applies the same "moderation" to single malt that we do to
>rust hunting we'll need our own AA chapter.
>Steve
>Who finds being broke or in his wifes presence the only source or
>moderation either way

Single malts still taste like peat flavored Listerine to me but otherwise 
the Support Group From Hell is, with the collective ingenuity of 
countless Porch denizens, here to help you fully live the Galoot 
Experience.

Yes, we're here to help you rationalize that next tool purchase, give you 
tips on haggling for flea market and garage sale bargains, and the best 
techniques for getting the new acquisition out of the Mobile Solar Kiln 
and into the basement or garage past the skeptical eyes of your 
Significant Other.

We're here to give you tips on Cubicle or Office Woodworking without 
getting caught by the Powers That Be and Wound Management techniques when 
those inevitable 'Uh-Ohs' strike at work or home. Plus how to get blood 
off of your half-completed projects or the best choice of stains and 
glazes to disguise the spatter patterns if it sets up before your return 
from the Urgent Care Center.

We're here to provide you with an unending series of Internet links to 
*bay auctions, new tool sources, pictures of 'whatsits', and jpegs of our 
recent finds. You won't actually have to spend another minute woodworking 
again as all of your spare moments can be spent on hunting new tools, 
getting them into the house, cleaning them up, sharpening them, cutting 
yourself with them, telling us about them and reading about the 
experiences of other Porch dwellers.

If you do have an overwhelming urge to actually use your tools, we're 
here to give you pages of contradictory advice on bench selection and 
construction as well as bench dogs. Yes, bench dogs, round or square? 
Plus endless and entertaining discussion of toolchest construction and 
placement.

We're here to teach you the Art of the Gloat. Soon you too will be 
writing long rambling accounts of your flea market and garage sale forays 
where you found rare and sought after tools for less than the price of 
fast-food combo meals. We'll teach you the art of Drive-by Gloating by 
sprinkling accounts of rare tool acquisition in your discourse on other 
topics and posting jpegs of your recent finds with other 'hot' tools 
innocently placed in the background, just slightly out of focus. Or 
posting in-your-face jpegs of toolchests stuffed with gleaming tools 
while ostensibly demonstrating some arcane construction technique.

We're here to fling you down that Slippery Slope and to give you 
additional velocity when it looks like you might be slowing down. 

The Support Group From Hell. Serving countless Galoots since late 1995.
****************************
Tom Price (TomPrice@a...)
Will Work For Tools
The Galoot's Progress Old Tools site is at:
http://homepage.mac.com/galoot_9/galtprog.html