Well SWMBO was out this morning. This was essential to my cleaning of
the grocery bags of beeswax I snarfed up for almost nothing.
You see, I had a plan. Not just a plan, but a better plan. I was going
to combine two steps of cleaning -- I would put the beeswax in
*weighted* panty hose in a pot of hot water. The soluble debris would
dissolve, the sinking debris would go down, and the floating debris
would stay in the pnthy hose, sunk at the bottom of the pot. No need to
scrape the bottom of the block. Ingenious, yes?
I knew just the pot. My wife has this humongous "stock pot" -- tall,
deep, a 6 lobster pot. But, wise from 35+ years of marriage I knew
that , despite the reasonablenes of the request, the assurances of
washing, the gentle kiss, she would balk.
Best wait till she was out.
So this morning I found old panty hose, shoveled in beeswax, put in some
stones, tied it all tight, sank it in the near full pot, and turned on
the burner.
Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Big, big, pot. Watched. Not hot.
So I decided I would check the news on the computer. Check the sports
scores. Read Oldtools. Check out the new JibJab. In a seeming flash of a
moment, I heard "shooshing" noises from the kitchen. Comprehension was
immediate. I leapt up. So did Beaker my trusty Springer Spaniel, who
slightly more nimble and speedy tried to pass me in the hallway. A
moment of confusion and I was pitched forward on the floor, sliding into
the kitchen, and sort of right on down the floor on a slick pad of foamy
beeswax and hot water. Fortunately stopped by a bag of potatoes I have
not yet taken to the basement.
A leap to the burner with a wary eye to the fire extinguisher. The pot
is flinging gobs of foaming beeswax out 1-2' . Burner off. Poured a
bowl of cold water into the pot. Surveyed the mess. Everything smelled
of honey.
Paper towels, string mop (I'll have to get a new head), dtergent, floor
cleans up OK. But..stove has congealed. Find that panty hose actually
cleans congealed wax best-- sort of rubs it off like a screen sander for
wall board. I have a big bag of panty hose.
But it doesn't quite get it all off. A thin film is left. But rubbing
that with a rag sure leaves a nice shine.
So when SWMBO gets home, I plan on telling her I polished her stove.
Beaker won't say anything.
Regards,
John Lederer
Oregon Wisconsin
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